Tazmin's Top Tips for Setting Meaningful Goals in 2024

Tazmin 0:06

Hello, everyone, and welcome to another episode of the SEO Mindset podcast. This is going to be the last episode of the year. And it's going to be a slightly different one because it is just me on my own. Sarah is not joining me for this episode, nor is any guest. But what we're really hoping to do in this episode is to talk about an important topic, that what that is of goals. You've probably seen it all over the internet, everyone is focusing on what happened this year, did you achieve your goals what's happening next year. And we wanted to take a moment to just pause and remind ourselves and our listeners that it's really valuable. You know, the This podcast is all about growth and personally developing, but developing in a way that's authentic to you. So what we've decided to do is republished one of the previous episodes that we had recorded on meaningful goals, and supplement it with this one, which is going to take you through some steps that you can take on your pro your journey in goal setting. So that's the aim, the idea is not to just get swept along with how other people are telling you to set goals, what goals to set, but to take a step back and think about what it is that you want. Because what I find is that there's a lot of information out there on what you should be doing, how you should be living your life. And that very quickly turns into huge plans, new menus, gym membership, big list of books to read. But it can be really overwhelming, too much to handle. And then I find that the enthusiasm wears off. And those goals just fizzle out. And then you feel a bit fishy about the whole process. So I wanted to take some time out and ask, you know, what if this year could be different, what if this is a year that you nail those goals? And I've got 10 steps that you can take to crafting ones that align with you.

ort of put more of that in my: 2024

And that leads me very nicely into step number two, which is Reflect on your values. So reflect on who you are and what your values are. Because what this is telling you that what matters the most to you, and it gives your life meaning. And sometimes that's even looking at what you don't want. So when you're setting goals, it's important to align them with what your values are. Because if you don't, it won't work. And if you're not sure about what your values are, look at how you spend your time. That'll give you a lot of clues. I'll give you a very mundane or seemingly mundane example. I spent a lot of my time cleaning my home and cooking and that's because my home is important to me. I actually enjoy taking care of it. I enjoy cooking for myself, cooking for my family. I enjoy cooking nutritious nutritional meals. And that's because a big part sort of who I am is a homemaker and I get joy and energy from fulfilling that role. So if I was to set a goal of something like, you know, become a serf, seven figure coach, that could well take up a lot of my time, that would then conflict with this big part of my intensity, which is a homemaker. And one of those would suffer, which means that goal perhaps isn't for me. So think about the goals that you are setting, what does it take to make them come true to fulfil them? And is it going to conflict with a particular value? Another way of looking at it is one of my values is contribution. So if I took on another voluntary position, for example, if I decided to give up my time, to help a worthy cause, or somebody who needed help, that would be where a goal and value is aligned. So that's one that is going to work. So that was step number two.

Step number three is declutter your mind. Our minds are full of stuff that we need to do, and the need is in inverted commas. And that could be from spring cleaning, that could be doing a tax return that could be redecorating particular room, I'm letting on a lot about my life. In this episode, I feel what that does is you can stop us thinking clearly or creatively. And what is a way of out of it is write down all of the things that are in your head, just put them on a list. Take them out of your head onto a piece of paper and create like your to do list your massive to do list, and then be really what's the word? Some auditing is be really careful and strict and maybe even a little harsh. Go through the ones that don't need to be done, and just delete them. Because sometimes we think we need to do something, but we don't actually then go through the list of the ones that are remaining and think, Is it me that needs to do this? Or is it somebody else, if it's someone else, delegate them. And the third step, whatever is rare, whatever is remaining, put a date on them. So you know that everything that's in your head is now on a piece of paper, it's been audited, you've got to date them, just put it aside. What that does is clears your mind for the next steps. Because the next step in particular is quite a big one.

So we're now on step number four. And this is about clarifying your vision. I find that often goal setting is doesn't include vision establishment, and I think vision is so important. We do it for organisations that we work for, but not often about ourselves. So a vision is a clear mental picture of what the future could or should look like. It's an idea of the kind of life that you want to lead. The person you want to be. It should be aspirational. And it provides you with direction. So questions to you is, in this future of yours, in this vision of your future, what are you doing? Where are you living? What do your relationships look like? Who is in your life? What work are you doing? How are you feeling? All of these are really important. Obviously, that's not an exhaustive list. But it's enough of a list to give you an idea that think bigger than I want to get fitter, or I want to be promoted. That's definitely part of it. But what does the future your ideal future look like? And define what success looks like to you in different areas of life. So what does a rich life look like for you? One example for me is and I may have mentioned it before, I'm not really into cars. For me a car is taking me from Step A to step B. As long as it works and it's functional. I'm happy with it for somebody else. Their idea for car is more elaborate than that. So their idea for rich life would include a car that perhaps I wouldn't spend time or money on. So know what success looks like to you and create a mental image of what that vision looks like.

Step number five, identify the key areas in your life. So what do you want to focus The song and think holistically synopsis. Like I said just about health or careers, I would say pick between six to eight. Because if you have too few, you might miss something important. Or if there's too many, it can be confusing. So ideas are health, career or business, relationships, social life, finances, your environments, environments biggie for me, my home, contribution, spirituality, faith, and another real biggest personal development. So look at your life as an overall because when we think about work life balance, or we, we think just focus on one element, we're missing other parts that are really important to us.

And then this leads into step number six, explore what you want in each area. So there's so many different ways of doing this. And I recommend that you try more than one way, because each way will give you a different picture. One way of exploring what you want in each area is journaling. Ask yourself some really powerful questions and pay attention to the images that and feelings that they evoke. So for example, if I'm journaling about my business, and what I want to create in that business, it would, you know, if I, again, going back to the seven figure coach and hustle, hustle, hustle and have lots of clients, that doesn't sit very well with me, I would prefer to have a, you know, fewer clients, because they're like, really invested in their future get to know them. So that for me is more important, doesn't mean it's important for everyone. But you know, other people have a different way of doing it. So pay attention to how you're feeling about that when you're journaling. Another way is doing a dreams list. So this is where you just let go of any thing that's going to hold you back and put down all of your dreams and wishes, you know, dream big, don't hold back, be creative, put it all down. Another way is to do doing a vision board. So that's a visual representation of what a great life looks like. These used to be very, very popular a few years ago. Now one that's becoming more popular is efficient list. So again, you've got your key areas of your life. But underneath each one, you're writing down what you want in that, and that gives you the ability to be more detailed than a vision board. Another way is wheel of life again, that eat this used to be very popular. So this is where you draw a circle. And you've got say six or eight categories, you divide the circle into six or eight categories, five sections, bit like you're cutting a cake. And from the centre, the centre is zero, and the outer edge of the circle would be 10. And you put, you know, numbers along along the lines, see if we can find your picture and I'll put put that in the show notes as well. So you then score yourself out of 10. On each section, you joined the lines together, so the dots together. And what that does is it reveals how balanced or imbalanced your life is where you're very satisfied, and we're not satisfied. Definitely, definitely could do with better explanation than that. So I will find you one and I'll put that into the show notes. But the idea is that you you get an awareness of how satisfied you are in each area, and where you want to do more work. So all of these all of these methods, be it journaling, vision, boarding vision listing real of life dreaming big. What it does is that it gives you an idea of what your goals could be, and goals.

Now Step seven is to really understand what the goals are. They're your targets, your objectives. They're what you're going to guide, they're going to guide you on what actions and efforts you're going to take, and they're going to give you clear focus. What goes to is that they stop us drifting and help us action opportunity. I just want to stress that a goal doesn't have to be about doing something your goal might be I want to feel happier. And then the tactics underneath that will help you get to that state. So it can be about a feeling or goal could be, I want to be karma. So it's not just about the doing, it's about the feeling, it's about the being. But whatever it is, once you've established that, then it's about setting actions that will help you get there. So whichever method you have used to create those goals, sort of to get to that idea.

Step number eight is actually setting them. What do you want to achieve? What part of your vision are you creating? Basically, what would add to your rich life so your vision may have been about getting fitter, you may have visualised different exercise that you enjoy that you don't enjoy. You may have used journaling to go through experiences that you've had with exercise about which one works and which one didn't. So step number eight is actually about setting them what is going to help you get fitter.

Step number nine is to look at whether your goal should be smart or dumb. Now, SMART goals, again, are very popular. instil Are you see them a lot. The SMART goals are a goal that is specific, measurable, achievable, relevant and time bound. We've heard it, you know, time and time again. And they're really great for being laser sharp on what you have to do. Sometimes they can feel a bit boring, and not very passionate. And that's where dumb goals come in. So dumb goals are dream driven, uplifting, method base and Behaviour Driven. And I would say, maybe, you know what, I've got a, I've got LinkedIn posts where I wrote about this, I'll put that in the show notes as well to give you more detail. But I find that dumb goals are really good for long term, open ended targets, they inspire you to be big, and believe in your ability to achieve anything that you set your mind to. And the SMART goals are really great for setting short term specific objectives. But they can be limiting when it comes to those long term ambitious goals. And I feel that there is place for both of them, you have to choose the one that's right for you choose a framework that works. Sometimes that depends on someone's personality, or then or even the nature of their goal. But having a combination is really good, I feel. So you've gone through all of the steps, you've got some goals, you've got some dumb goals, you've got some smart goals, you've done your audit, and you've done your recap all of that. And that brings me to step number 10, which is the last step, which is your goals audit. Before you dive into working on the goals and setting out to achieve them, take a moment to do a little bit of an audit. Write them down. Because if you've achieved them, and really reflect on them, how does it make you feel? If they don't make you feel excited, that goal isn't really for you. Ask yourself, are they aligned with your values? If not, you might not stick to them? Are they aligned with who you want to be? Again? If not, are they really the goals for you? Will achieving them impact your life positively? What would it do for your life? Because if it's not something positive, again, question yourself, Is that the right goal for me? And lastly, imagine going through all of the steps, it would take as many as you can think of that it would take you to go from here to achieving. How do you feel about those steps? Can you imagine enjoying the process? Can you imagine going through all of that process? Because if you can't or if you feel it's going to be miserable or if it's going to negatively impact your life in a way that you're not happy with? Again, is that the goal for you?

So that's my very quick summary on steps that you can take to set goals. that worked for you. I hope it's been useful. And I'm going to put as many resources as I can in the show notes. And I will. We'll also be publishing the How to Set meaningful goals that we, that we recorded last year. I hope it's been useful. And I have nothing else to say no except to wish you all happy holidays. Happy New Year. And look forward to joining Sarah, and getting back to the original team early next year. Take care everyone bye for now.

Sarah McDowell: 20:46

Hello, and welcome to another episode of SEO mindset. Your hosts are myself and Tazmin Suleman. Quick reminder that if you want to support us, you can give us a donation over at buy me a coffee, it can be a one off donation, and if that's something that you'd like to do, then you'll find a link in the show notes of this episode. And I also want to remind you that you can also visit the seomindset.co.uk/listen, and you'll be able to subscribe to where you listen to podcasts. So again, the link will be in the show notes. But that way, you will never miss a new episode when it's available. So Tazmin, hi!

Tazmin: 21:43

Hi Sarah. How are you?

Sarah McDowell: 21:45

I am splendid. I mean feeling a little bit coldy but then I think everyone is at this time of year.

Tazmin: 21:53

I've got a cough so if I do splutter apologies in advance, but I've done all the prep, I've had the hot water and honey and Strepsils. But fingers crossed we get through this episode without me having a coughing fit.

Sarah McDowell: 22:08

Fingers crossed. I'm sure it'll be fine. But yeah, and because we were joking about this earlier, weren't we about sounding husky and sexy?

Tazmin: 22:19

This is this is the the new theme for this episode. Husky presenters and Christmas spirit.

Sarah McDowell: 22:29

Oh, yes. We've not got long till the big day. Feeling Christmassy or?

Tazmin: 22:35

No. I'm really not. I'm sorry. I'm sorry. To all of our listeners who really are in that zone. My daughter keeps on trying to get me into that zone. She's moving out soon. So I said, Go and take your Christmas tree with you. We're having steak and chips. She wasn't impressed. So she now She's saying she's not moving out until after Christmas.

Sarah McDowell: 23:01

What makes me laugh. And I mean, so. So I am a vegan. So yeah, but I hear so many people having discussions about Turkey, but most of the times they don't like Turkey. They don't really like they prefer chicken, for example. And yet just because of this tradition of eating turkey. So why do that to yourself, eat what you want. If you want steak and chips, you have steak and chips. If I won, I don't know what I'd go. Yeah. I mean, I'm trying to think what my go to Christmas meal would be. But I'm not really that fussy to be fair.

Tazmin: 23:44

But yeah, to be fair, we usually have lamb. I joke. steak and chips. I'm doing it just to wind her up. But I know we'll end up having she's vegetarian. What does she care what? But so yeah, lamb, but I have been known to. I love leftovers. That's probably why I won't do steak and chips because you don't usually have a lot of leftovers. But I've been known to roast a leg of lamb and two chickens all at the same time, just so I could have roast chicken with leftovers.

Sarah McDowell: 24:19

Sounds like the dream. Sounds like the dream. So what? You It's you It's your episode, isn't it? Is it like you've planned this? So what we're talking about today.

Tazmin: 24:33

So it's more spontaneous episode this week. So last Saturday, I had a group of wonderful women at home. And we had a life success strategy day. It's what I called it. And the idea was for us all to take a day out of our busy lives man a bit of time and think about what did we want to achieve in 2023 but really tap into what did we really, really want It's not what did my boss want me to learn? What did this person want me to do? And what took me by surprise was that a lot of the women really struggled? Yeah, so we had to take a step back. And he said, Well, you know, what do you want for you that threw them that really threw them. But I think that might be quite normal. So we went through five steps, you get down to the bottom of what goals are meaningful to them. And that's what the point of this episode one is. It's not about what again, what you manage your wants, or what the business wants, or what everybody else wants, what are the few things that you want, doesn't have to be few can be loads can be whatever you want it to be, but they have to be meaningful to you.

Sarah McDowell: 25:49

Yeah, and that is so important. And it's quite interesting that you say that like, like, people aren't sort of familiar with this kind of thinking, are they? And like, I don't know if investment is the right word? No, I'm just using a buzzword. But it's like, because you obviously, like you're talking to your boss, you're talking to your work colleagues, you're talking to your friends, you're talking to your family. And you can easily see how their goals become sort of like your goals. Yes.

Tazmin: 26:25

Yeah. Because then there is this, almost like a social norm of all you should want to go on a really long holiday. Holidays are a typical one where you think you should have them. But if, if you really tap into what do you want, maybe you don't want to, maybe you don't want to get through all of the stress of looking for a holiday paying for a holiday packing for the holiday. winding down from work, going on this holiday coming back having to deal with all of the laundry, blah, blah, blah, some people quite like to have a week at home without the nonsense of travel times and getting to airports, and so on and so forth. So it's about, again, like I say, checking in with yourself, and figuring out what's meaningful to you. And you're presenting, so you're ready, you're ready for step number one, Sarah,

Sarah McDowell: 27:18

Give it to me, I am ready.

Tazmin: 27:22

So one of the things that we found when we were doing this last Saturday was there was so much clutter in people's minds. They couldn't actually get to the bits where they thought about what they wanted. And a lot of the women were saying, Oh, yes, I need to do this, I need to do that I need to the other I can't even think about myself until all of this stuff is sorted. So step number one was declutter your mind. Our minds are so full of stuff that we need to do that we can't think clearly. So step number one is write down all of the things that are cluttering your mind your big to do list, and then do an audit. So the first step, if your audit is be really ruthless, cross out the things that aren't that important. Do you really need to sort out the loft? Do you really need I mean, if you do, go for it, but get it all down on a piece of paper, and then cross out the ones that actually aren't that important, because, again, we filled with this, everybody else has to list as well. Then the stuff that's left? Do you need to be the person who does it?

Sarah McDowell: 28:41

Delegation, delegation.

Tazmin: 28:44

You know, it might mean an awkward conversation, it might mean reminding people of their roles and responsibilities in the home, for example. But yeah, delegates and an on that list, make it visible to everyone in the household, and say, right, have crossed out those. And those are, those five are yours, husband, whoever, and the ones that are left that can only be done by you, or you really, really want to do them, put a date that you're going to commit to doing them and put that list away. So hopefully, all of that clutter now has got you've got a plan to deal with it.

Sarah McDowell: 29:27

So it's the idea that bye bye writing writing it down then. Like you're actually taking it from your brain, and you're putting it down on paper. So that's the actual physical, you're doing something so it doesn't just stick in your head.

Tazmin: 29:46

It's been like in that scene and Harry Potter Harry Potter with Dumbledore extracts all of the thoughts.

Sarah McDowell: 29:54

I don't know Harry Potter that well, but I'm sure our listeners are gonna be a Harry Potter fan.

Tazmin: 29:59

I hope so. Okay, so that's step number one, you've got everything off your to do list on a piece of paper. Step number two is some people find it difficult to answer, what do I want, but they're much better understanding what they don't want. So write your don't want list.

Sarah McDowell: 30:17

Ah, okay.

Tazmin: 30:20

I do not want to go scuba diving, I know that, would it take me out of my comfort zone? Probably don't want to do it. No, not doing it. I mean, I use that as an extreme example.

Sarah McDowell: 30:32

And I suppose as well, you could put like two things that and it's not just the your home and personal life, but this could easily be, you could be talking about your work life as well. Right. So when you're decluttering, and like, do that in the workplace as well, I guess. And then especially with the delegation, because you might think, Ah, this is for me to do. But yeah. But yeah, like, I suppose there might be someone that has asked you to do something or suggested a goal or a target for you. But actually, that's not right for you. So then I suppose that goes into your no list, I suppose.

Tazmin: 31:15

One, one example is supposing your job searching that next year, you want a new job? What don't you want that job to be? For me, I wouldn't want a job that required me to travel a lot. So that would be my I don't want to do that. I don't want to I don't mind doing things at the weekend. This is a Saturday morning 1125 that we're recording this. So that's okay. But if it required me to go here, there and everywhere, it's not what I want to do with my life.

Sarah McDowell: 31:47

Yes, very important.

Tazmin: 31:52

So those two steps should clear the way. Yeah, for you to start thinking deeper about what you do want. And I think that's a good point where we can have a break.

Sarah McDowell: 32:02

Yes, because I think people can use this break right to have a think currently about decluttering in like actually having to think about this kind of thing. Because what what have you got in store when we come back for part two?

Tazmin: 32:17

So then it is about what you know, getting curious about what you do want. dumping all that down on a piece of paper and again, reflecting so bit like we had what's on your to do list that's currently there we creating a new to do list, and being equally ruthless about that one. Wonderful.

Sarah McDowell: 32:40

Okay. All right, we shall be back. Thank you for tuning in for another episode of the SEO mindset podcast. If you enjoy the podcast and our episodes, you can support me in Tazmin by giving us a donation on our buy me a coffee page. The URL is the Seo mindset.co.uk. Forward slash donate, you can donate as much or as little and be and we'd be very appreciative. You can also follow us subscribe to the podcast by going to the SEO mindset.co.uk forward slash listen. So by going there, you can subscribe or follow us on your podcast playing platform of choice. And this is a great way to be notified whenever a new podcast episode is live and ready for you to listen to.

We are back for part two people.

Tazmin: 33:47

So what are your thoughts about the stuff we've covered in part one, Sarah?

Sarah McDowell: 33:51

I really like the idea of decluttering your mind? Because yeah, I think in a previous episode, we sort of talked about how you have is it like 70,000 thoughts a day or something. And obviously, your brains gonna get cluttered. So I like the idea of like writing them down. And whilst it's important to know what you want to do, like, I really liked the advice about thinking about what you don't want to do. So how you gave the example of the job, if you're looking for a new job, but maybe you could like assess your current job that you're doing and maybe there's some tasks that you're already doing that you don't want to do or you feel like your time could be better spent somewhere out so think is good. Or like life goals as well. Like maybe there's something that you do religiously, like every Wednesday or whatever, but you're sort of thinking actually, I'm not really enjoying it anymore. Like so. Yeah, I think that was really good and definitely got me thinking. So great. Yeah.

Tazmin: 35:00

And then I think it's about everyone giving themselves permission. If there's something they don't like doing, they're allowed to say, I don't like doing this now. Or if there's something else they want to start equally they're allowed to.

Sarah McDowell: 35:15

Because you don't owe any anyone anything. The only thing you owe yourself, obviously, yeah. But yeah, that's so key to like, it's okay. To say no. And like, if you don't want to do something anymore, that's like, fine. Just Just explain. And obviously, try not be a dick about it. Yeah.

Tazmin: 35:39

Because at the end of the day, when you're saying yes to something that you don't actually want to do, you're saying no to yourself?

Sarah McDowell: 35:47

Yes I was gonna finish the sentence, because I remember that from the course that I was on. Yeah. Every time you say yes to something, you're saying no to something for yourself? Yes.

Tazmin: 35:57

All right, I'm gonna dive into step number three, because this one's a bit of a biggie. But at the same time, I don't want anyone feeling overwhelmed about it. Take your time. Be gentle with yourself. But this step is about being really curious about you. Rather than saying, I want to do these five goals, or set these five goals, ask yourself some questions. What are you good at? What's your thing? What do you find easy? What do you enjoy all of these occludes on what sort of thing that you're going to find fulfilling. So I know, I'm not good at riding a bike, it's not my thing. I don't find it easy, I don't enjoy it. Therefore, if I'm going to be setting my exercise regime, cycling around Milton Keynes is not the thing I'm gonna do. I like listening to audiobooks, I like walking, I like taking my time, that's going to be the thing that works better for me. The other thing you can look at is imagine when people ask you for your help, what's the thing that most people will ask you to do. And you actually really, really enjoy it, you do it for free, all day long, it makes you feel really alive. Think about times when you've been in that situation, you've jumped at this opportunity, you feel really good about it. And that whole environment makes you feel like you're thriving. Yes. And this silly little example, for this, even though I've already done my I don't like Christmas, which is not true. It's not that I don't like quizzes. I love wrapping presents, I really love wrapping first. And I do like Christmas songs. So in the past, I volunteered at one of these places where you wrap Christmas presents for everyone. Now not saying that that's going to become my job forever in a day. But I know that it makes me feel good. And maybe that's something I put in place once a year or whatever it is, I'm going to spend some time volunteering in this area. And it also makes me feel fulfilled and satisfied, satisfied. So that's something else you could ask yourself. What were you doing when you felt like you were being worthwhile to a cause or to to a charity. Other areas that you can talk to yourself about is when have you done something when it felt like your true self. So you know, when you're doing a task that feels really difficult. And you're going against the grain, you're not enjoying it. Yes, you might be learning something, but it's, it feels like you're going uphill all the time. And equally, there are some things that when you're doing it just feels like you've slipped into that task, glided your way through it, and it hasn't felt like a chore. So all of these things will start giving you clues about what you enjoy where you have felt worthwhile, because there'll be things that you really enjoy that somebody else might not somebody might hate wrapping presents, for example, or somebody might like cycling when you don't like cycling. So just because you find it easy and meaningful. And you enjoy it doesn't mean everyone else is going to and vice versa.

Sarah McDowell: 39:41

It's just, I just want to pick up some things that we spoke about. So like, especially around your point about your true self, and I think that's so important and like, obviously, we can't live in this i idealistic world where you're going to be doing, like everything that you're doing, you're going to be enjoying, because that's not how being an adult works. That's not how home life that's not how work happens and stuff. But I suppose it's about being aware of the stuff that you do like and the stuff that you don't like. So then you can make sure you've got a balance or when you know that you've got a task that you've got to do that you don't like, is there a way that you can make it easier that so for example, I wouldn't I don't necessarily like cleaning. But I love listening to podcasts. Right. So when I'm cleaning, that's a great opportunity for me to binge on some of my favourite podcasts. Okay. So I think it's also about that.

Tazmin: 40:56

Yeah, I think so. And I think, I think though, once you start going down this path of really checking into yourself about what is it that you enjoy doing, and who are you and what makes you you, you'll find ways to do that more and more. So I hear what you're saying that life isn't perfect, people have got jobs and need to earn insane amount of living. And you can't suddenly say, I'm gonna go off and do this other thing. Without it being it without the repercussions, everyone's got a choice. And the choice comes with consequences. But I do believe that once you start taking steps to incorporate that more and more in your life, so for example, no matter which career I've had, whether it's when I was a developer, QA, SEO, when I was managing a team for the data team, I always found ways of incorporating personal development into my job, whether that was doing free lunch and learns, or volunteering or being part of great place to work. Colleague development, I always found ways and it was, it was telling me that this is what you meant to be doing. Yeah, yeah. But you always thought, Okay, I've got this job, I need to be doing that. But at some point, I decided, you know, what, why don't I just do this, let's give it a go. I have my gap here in my mid 50s. Like, you're gonna give myself a gap here. And then you start taking steps you and I had met a year ago, we started talking about a podcast about poetry. And here we are a year on doing more and more of these podcasts that we are, you know, people are finding useful now. And it's benefiting them. So although I'm not telling people how to run their lives, I am saying that it is important to tap into who you really are, and find ways of incorporating bits. However much that bit looks like it could be a teeny tiny bit could be a whole career change. But don't dismiss it. I think that's what I'm trying to urge people not to do. Yeah, dismiss that true point of view.

Sarah McDowell: 43:15

Yes, definitely. 100% agree.

Tazmin: 43:19

So once you are in that zone, of what is it that you want to do? What makes you feel fulfilled? Who are you, again, brain dump all of your goals, don't worry about how you're going to achieve them what it means just get them down on a piece of paper. And then the fifth step is, you know, how we reflected on our to do lists, I want people to take a little time and reflect on the goal list. And for each one, fast forward, okay, my goal is to sell a sale around the world, for example, my goal isn't this, just making it very clear. My personal goal is not the surprising, that's one of the ones that you put on a piece of paper. Go through the steps it would take to make that happen. Right from the good stuff and the not so good stuff, and then completion. How does that make you feel? Because if it's not making you feel excited, and enthusiastic, maybe that goal isn't really for you.

Sarah McDowell: 44:30

Yes, yeah. If it starts feeling like a chore, I suppose or like you're not enjoying it, then obviously, yeah, that needs to get in the bed.

Tazmin: 44:42

Yeah. And some of it will feel like a chore. So for example, again, going back to running a coaching business, there are parts of it that I do that. It's not that the most fun, but I know that it's a necessary step to get to where I want Want to get to? And I'm okay with that.

Sarah McDowell: 45:02

And as and when in this podcast, right, like, the actual recording and get into chapter yourself and other amazing guests and stuff and like producing something that's helpful for the community. I love that. But then there are parts of having a podcast, which we both it's not that we don't really like, Well, suppose yeah, like we find more challenging, don't we say? Yeah.

Tazmin: 45:30

And that's where the discipline comes in. That's when the recognition that okay, this is part of it. So if you were sailing around the world, there will be days when you know, you're going to go through some rough times, and it's going to be cold, and you're going to be lonely and all the rest of it. Are you okay with us? The other thing is check, are they aligned with your values, because values are the things that will help us make a choice. And off the top of my head, I cannot think of a single one right now, because I think my brain has gone fuzzy. But for me, family time is huge. And if there was a goal, that meant that I was being taken away from family for a long period of time, it would have to be a brilliant goal and amazing goal, because I thrive, when I've got my family around me, they anchor me, they nurture me, they, they fill my cup. So without it, I do, I do struggle. I can cope with a few days. But if it was like a month away from home, I'd struggle with that. And I would have to question, is that goal important enough for me to be without family for a month? Maybe I wouldn't be one. But that's, it's just checking in with your values. Because if it doesn't align, then you're likely not to stick with them. Yeah. And then I suppose off often, an offshoot of that is, are they aligned with who you want to be? So using that previous example, if I had to be away for a month from family, but it was to help a set of young children going through a difficult period of their lives, and help them with personal development and nurturing? And would I do that? Yes, I probably would, because it's aligned with who I want to be.

Sarah McDowell: 47:34

Yeah. And, and I suppose it's about, so you know, that it's aligned with who you want to be. And like, it's still going to be aligned with one of your values, obviously, not so much your family one, but your the values of like giving back, or helping people in need. And I suppose it's just about Okay. Like putting in a contingency plan of like what you're going to do so spending time with the family before and after. Making sure that like, I don't know that you have a phone call or FaceTime while you're out sort of thing. So yeah, like I think things can always be tweaked and altered car they.

Tazmin: 48:19

And it's been again, I keep on using this. It's about checking in with yourself, and figuring out, yes, I want to do this thing. I'm going to find this bit challenging, but it's okay, I'll find a way through. It aligns with this value, but it doesn't align with this. And this is how I'm going to make sure that I've put everything I need to do in place to make it you know, give myself the best possible chance of succeeding.

Sarah McDowell: 48:51

Wonderful, wonderful. Yeah. All right.

Tazmin: 48:55

So we've completed sorry. So we've come to the end of our five steps.

Sarah McDowell: 49:04

Yes, yes. I was just gonna say I've definitely my brain. Scott. Got me thinking of things to do, and stuff. And I mean, what would your advice be for those who would be worried about failing with goals? Let's say we like we go through the steps. And we set up our goals and stuff. How do we get over that fear of like, I don't want to, I don't want to because I don't want to fail.

Tazmin: 49:33

Or so my quote one question would be, would you rather go through the feeling of failure than the feeling of regrets?

Sarah McDowell: 49:43

Yes, yeah.

Tazmin: 49:45

I'm saying I did years and years ago when I was working at a company. Somebody once said to me, oh, Tazmin. Can you make me a curry? I said, Okay, I can make your curry. So I bought he was Marc Webb his name was so I've made him a curry. And then somehow that Then snowballed into a weekly curry club, and send out a message on a Monday saying this week I'm making this curry. Let me know by Wednesday if you want it. And then they I bring in the curry. So I then thought, oh, it'd be great to have a catering business. I started that catering business, it didn't go to plan. Some people would say it failed. But at least now I can I know that I gave it a go. Because I think if I hadn't, I would have regretted it taught me a lot. Yeah. And you'll always learn something about yourself. So I've learned huge amounts. And I take that learning with me everywhere open.

Sarah McDowell: 50:39

So the biggest thing is not to be scared of failure, right? And failure isn't a negative thing. It's like failure is about self discovery, isn't it? And you can either turn failure into a teaching lesson, like you just have had, or you can pivot and you can change it into a positive, right? Because you always hear, don't you that like the multimillionaires of the world? You hear how like many of them were like failing for ages, like not really making money, or this was like their last shot. So yeah, I think it's just, you've got to have some resilience, I suppose, don't you? And like not being scared if the big F word because she do what I mean? Like, it's alright to fail. Like, it's not always negative, and you and you will fail they there are gonna be times in your life where you're gonna fail, but either to treat it as a, as a lesson learned, or pivot, change it, how can you tweak it to make it into a success for next time?

Tazmin: 51:53

Absolutely. You know what, if you if you don't try, you won't fail. But that's awful. Because then you're stuck, you're stuck where you are. So if you want to move anywhere from where you are, you've got to give something a go. If you give it a go, it may not go to plan. It doesn't matter. Learn something from it. Pivot yourself, reframe it. And every day you are becoming somebody who is getting better and better at being you and therefore you can never fail. Wonderful.

Sarah McDowell: 52:23

Wonderful. All right, well, unfortunately, we have run out of time.

Tazmin: 52:32

I think we packed a lot in this episode.

Sarah McDowell: 52:35

I think it's been really good. I mean, my notebooks full of scribbles. So yeah. Do you want to know my main takeaway? That would be wonderful. I think my main takeaway would be the thing that we've just discussed really, like, obviously, like, yeah, like they're so like, you've given some awesome steps of how we can be true to ourselves and make sure that we're setting the goals that are important to us. And yeah, I love all that, that the auditing side. But the key thing, is that the conversation that we just had about failure, oh, well.

Tazmin: 53:11

Maybe we do an episode on failure. Yes, yes.

Sarah McDowell: 53:15

Or we could call it something funny, like the dreaded F word. And then people are gonna be like, Oh, anyway, shall we? And should we end with our pledge?

Tazmin: 53:28

Yes, we do.

Sarah McDowell: 53:32

Before we end with our pledge, I just want to remind people, as I said at the beginning of the episode, if you would like to support us, so you might have just heard a very squeaky micro there. If you're trying to support us, and you enjoy what we're doing, you join listening to our episode, you can donate to us via buy me a coffee. So you can do a one off donation for us. And we'll be very appreciative of that link in the show notes. So you can do that. And also, to make sure that you never miss an episode, and you don't get FOMO or you make sure that you listen to all the new episodes that come out, and head on over to the SEO mindset dot code at UK forward slash listen, because then you'll be able to subscribe to where you get your podcasts. So again, that link in the show notes. I'm going to hand over the pledge to you Tazmin.

Tazmin: 54:26

Okay. I am an SEO who prioritises mindset and personal growth and not just for rankings, improving visibility and algorithms.

Sarah McDowell: 54:37

There we go. hand on your heart. And I think because this is going to be the last episode before Christmas, yes, we should say happy holidays. Like have a wonderful festive time. If you celebrate Christmas, if you don't celebrate Christmas have have a wonderful time with family whatever you get up to.

Tazmin: 54:59

Have what you want, do what you want, it's your Christmas.

Sarah McDowell: 55:05

It is and we are going to be taking a short break, aren't we? A couple of weeks? A couple of weeks. But if you subscribe, right, you'll know as soon as we're back in the new year, because yeah, it won't be long.

Tazmin: 55:20

Happy Holidays everybody.

Sarah McDowell: 55:21

Happy holidays. That's the thing to say, isn't it? Yeah. Ho, ho, ho!

Tazmin: 55:29

and Happy Holidays to you, sir.

Sarah McDowell: 55:32

Happy holidays to you too. I hope you enjoy your steak and chips.

Tazmin: 55:38

Take care.